


The Oblivious Moon

by O_san



Series: Dating Tsukishima Kei According To Hinata Shōyō [2]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Confused Hinata Shouyou, First Love, Hinata Shouyou Needs a Hug, Hinata Shouyou in Love, Hinata and Miyagi Boys, Hinata and Tokyo Boys, Kageyama Tobio is a Good Friend, Kozume Kenma is a Tease, Love Confessions, M/M, Not Beta Read, Oblivious Tsukishima Kei, One-Sided Attraction, POV Hinata Shouyou, Pre-Relationship, Queerplatonic Hinata Shouyou/Kozume Kenma, Slow Burn, but not really one-sided attraction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-30
Updated: 2021-01-31
Packaged: 2021-03-16 21:49:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 11,788
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29089332
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/O_san/pseuds/O_san
Summary: It was exactly three days after he went back to Miyagi when Bokuto-san texted him about one thing he tried so hard to forget.
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou, Hinata Shouyou/Tsukishima Kei
Series: Dating Tsukishima Kei According To Hinata Shōyō [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2134266
Comments: 6
Kudos: 64





	1. When The Sun Misses His Moon

**Author's Note:**

> Hi!  
> This is the continuation of 'Enlightenment' and also the first part of Hinata's journey to get His Moon.  
> There will be two chapters. Again, the first chapter will have no Tsukishima (I'm so sorry), but the salty boy will finally appear in the second chapter.  
> Hope you enjoy the ride!

It was exactly three days after he went back to Miyagi when Bokuto-san texted him about one thing he tried so hard to forget.

> **Today**
> 
> **Coolest Ace!**
> 
> Did you tell the boy already?
> 
> **9.36 AM**
> 
> **Read**

And how that simple message ruined every protection Shōyō built around his heart by fulfilling his mind completely of someone he wished he didn’t like.

On the other hand, the message wasn’t something that he wasn’t expecting. Especially when the last conversation they both had was technically about Shōyō’s desperate love life. Which used to be blurry, but started to get clearer when the hint of him _might be gay_ , totally ripped off from Kenma’s statement about his problem from their latest video call, became the most possible reason for his current confused self. 

After all, the answer to Bokuto-san’s question was obvious.

The short answer would be a simple no.

Meanwhile, the longer one, what Shōyō preferred, consisted of too many topics at the same time, he was afraid it wouldn’t be Bokuto’s liking type of reply. Because, it’s the type of text that came up with a three-parts that included the warming up, the not-so-much important stuff, and finally, the answer.

The warming up is the starter. The standardized polite small talk his mother taught him since he was a child. A practical skill he had mastered over the years as the first son of the Hinata household. Things like ‘How are you, Bokuto-san?’, or ‘’How’s your practice going?’ is the great example. He would definitely add another question regarding Akaashi-san as the kind Setter is an important person for Bokuto-san’s life.

It was respectful and everyone likes to be treated kindly. Even the freaking Mean-shima, who even though always puts on a bitter expression whenever Shōyō asks if he’s okay when he looks exhausted at practice, likes it. The fact that Tsukishima didn’t call him ‘Shrimpy’ was enough proof to support his statement.

But if Bokuto-san found the first part of the text as a way Shōyō dodge the real question, he would not take it to heart, because really, it’s a matter of protecting his family’s name and nothing else.

The not-so-much important stuff would fill with what he’s been doing since he got back from Tokyo. Especially the one where he visited the younger boy’s house to talk about Volleyball and ended up in a disagreement over the importance between a Setter and an Ace. Just like one from the first fights they had when they just knew each other. Nevertheless, they agreed on one thing: to take the problem to the court. After they convinced Tanaka-senpai for thirty minutes to allow them to borrow the key to Karasuno’s gym, despite Daichi-senpai total rejection, they finally had their way. They played for hours until Daichi-senpai shouted at them to go back home while juggling his favorite baldy senpai. 

And if the story of him felt guilty to Tanaka-senpai sounded so out-of-context, Shōyō believed Bokuto-san would understand why he had to share this. Because he would agree with him that Kageyama was the brat in this case.

Lastly, the third one. The answer. The part Shōyō hated with all of his heart. Because this, this part, would show Bokuto-san the naked-truth of Shōyō cowardice.

As he had never, not even once, reached out to Tsukishima Kei until now. Heck, he didn’t even know if he really breathed the same air as the boy or not, because Tsukishima was a master of vanishing himself. The only time he had encountered Tsukishima through-out this summer vacation was through Karasuno group chat. Yes, one time. Virtually. With a bunch of other people, who were shocked to know their saltiest member is actually still alive. But that was not the real bad news, as the real one was how the short text (read: ‘Don’t call me that’) from that particular boy easily doubled up the longing feeling Shōyō had towards him.

Only Kami-sama knew how bad he missed the prick.

> **Today**
> 
> **Coolest Ace!**
> 
> Did you tell the boy already?
> 
> **9.36 AM**
> 
> **Read**
> 
> **Coolest Ace!**
> 
> My disciple!
> 
> **9.40 AM**
> 
> **Read**
> 
> **Coolest Ace!**
> 
> Why do you put me on Read?!
> 
> **9.40 AM**
> 
> **Read**
> 
> **Coolest Ace!**
> 
> Does the boy break your heart?
> 
> **9.40 AM**
> 
> **Read**
> 
> **Coolest Ace!**
> 
> MY DISCIPLE!!!! ARE YOU OKAY?!
> 
> **9.40 AM**
> 
> **Read**

The non-stop vibration from his phone made Shōyō more fidgety than before. This time, not because of his pining over the mean blonde, but more about the possibility of him, once again, triggering his favorite ace into another horrible state. Even to imagine he could make that happen leave a bad taste on his mouth.

So, he decided to choose the middle ground solution. Quickly.

> **Today**
> 
> **The Next Little Giant**
> 
> Hi! Bokuto-san! How are you? I miss you and Akaashi-san!
> 
> Also Kenma and Kuuro-san! I wish I can play Volleyball again with you guys!
> 
> I’m fine!!!! No one breaks my heart!!!
> 
> **9.41 AM**
> 
> **Read**

It was less than five seconds before Bokuto-san replied to him.

> **Today**
> 
> **Coolest Ace!**
> 
> SO HE LIKES YOU BACK?!
> 
> **9.40 AM**
> 
> **Read**

He flinched to see the excited reply from his teacher. As dumb as Tsukishima thinks he is, even Shōyō knew the answer to that question.

No, Tsukishima didn’t and wouldn’t ever like him back.

> **Today**
> 
> **The Next Little Giant**
> 
> I don’t tell him yet, Bokuto-san
> 
> **9.41 AM**
> 
> **Delivered**
> 
> **The Next Little Giant**
> 
> I’m sorry I disappointed you
> 
> **9.41 AM**
> 
> **Delivered**

Shōyō expected another explosion of texts from the other boy, but after three minutes received nothing, he wished he considered learning how to lie. Fortunately, right before he wanted to punch himself in the face, a text notification popped up on the screen of his phone.

> **Today**
> 
> **Coolest Ace!**
> 
> Hinata-kun.
> 
> **9.40 AM**
> 
> **Read**
> 
> **The Next Little Giant**
> 
> Bokuto-san?
> 
> **9.41 AM**
> 
> **Delivered**

> **Coolest Ace!**
> 
> No, this is Akaashi. Bokuto-san is not in his right mind at the moment.
> 
> Because he didn’t prepare himself for the answer you just said.
> 
> **9.40 AM**
> 
> **Read**
> 
> **Coolest Ace!**
> 
> He thought you either get a boyfriend or a broken heart.
> 
> **9.40 AM**
> 
> **Read**
> 
> **Coolest Ace!**
> 
> He only prepared two reactions to those two options.
> 
> **9.40 AM**
> 
> **Read**
> 
> **Coolest Ace!**
> 
> To send you a long paragraph of how to be a good boyfriend,
> 
> Or to bad-mouth the boy you like until you feel better.
> 
> **9.40 AM**
> 
> **Read**
> 
> **Coolest Ace!**
> 
> Because none of the options surfaced,
> 
> Bokuto-san get into an empty-head mode.
> 
> **9.40 AM**
> 
> **Read**
> 
> **Coolest Ace!**
> 
> It is very understandable as he prepared all of that for the last
> 
> three days.
> 
> **9.40 AM**
> 
> **Read**

Did the empty-head mode much better than the emo one? Did it also include tears?

> **The Next Little Giant**
> 
> Is Bokuto-san crying?
> 
> **9.41 AM**
> 
> **Delivered**

> **Coolest Ace!**
> 
> No, just stop functioning.
> 
> Don’t worry, Hinata-kun.
> 
> **9.40 AM**
> 
> **Read**

As long as Bokuto-san didn’t cry, Shōyō found the news great. If only Akaashi-san didn’t decide to prolong the conversation.

> **Coolest Ace!**
> 
> But, I personally expected this answer.
> 
> Do you want to talk about it with me?
> 
> **9.40 AM**
> 
> **Read**

Should he? Wouldn’t it be too troublesome for Akaashi-san to hear whatever this is? Nevertheless, the chance Akaashi-san could explain the reason why Shōyō still didn’t make a move to Tsukishima better was big. After all, who was Shōyō if being compared to Akaashi-san when it came to Bokuto-san?

> **The Next Little Giant**
> 
> Okay, Akaashi-san.
> 
> I’m sorry to bother you again
> 
> **9.41 AM**
> 
> **Delivered**

As soon as his message was read, Akaashi-san called Shōyō using Bokuto-san’s number. The sudden realization that the kind Setter preferred to talk to him rather than text made him startled. He jumped from his bed and ran towards his bedroom door. Quickly, he locked the door and let himself sit on the floor with his back leaning on the door. His mom and Natsu might not be at home, but he had to be careful about this. From Shōyō’s perspective, this position was the most ideal one, because he had his private place, but also could hear if somebody stepped into his house.

The reason was simple. He didn’t want to tell his mom about this side of him until he was sure enough about what he told Bokuto-san in Tokyo. Was that really him or just him who made up things? No matter how much Kenma gave him a bored look of ‘Are you kidding me, Shōyō?’ when he told him this, he still needed another reassurance. 

But it’s a different case when Kenma asked if his family could accept Shōyō if he turned out to be _really gay_ , the middle blocker told him they would. Because after hours of reflection, he believed one of his relatives is one and his parents didn’t mind.

Even Natsu, whenever they played her doll-house together, asked Shōyō to find his prince fast, rather than a princess.

Yet, even with all of that, he still wanted to be careful.

The still vibrating phone on his chest woke him up from his difficult internal dialogue. After two deep breaths, he accepted it.

“A-Akaashi-san?”

“Hinata-kun. Are you okay?

“Y-yes?”

“Yes?”

He gripped the end of his shirt due to his uneasy feeling, “Yes, I’m okay.”

“Good. So, tell me about this boy.”

Shōyō blinked. He might not have prepared anything for this sudden heart-to-heart conversation with Akaashi-san, but the fact that the older boy started it with the one he liked and not him made him confused.

“Huh?”

“Who’s this boy? Who is the boy that makes the unfearful Hinata Shōyō in fear?”

Again, he blinked. As he had never thought of this problem from that perspective. Maybe, if the one Shōyō liked is Kageyama, or Yamaguchi, or even the senpais, he would definitely put action on Bokuto-san’s advice as soon as he got to Miyagi. He was sure he would still be very nervous, but not as fearful as this. Because other people in Karasuno, aside from Tsukishima, work in the same understanding as Shōyō in terms of accepting honesty. Whether they liked him back or not, they would respect him. Because most of them are a bunch of unfiltered human beings who like something to be simpler than complicated. That was also the reason why they got along so well.

Except for Tsukishima, who was the quirkiest kid in the family and also the one who had it the hardest to adapt. And the only one who can read what he actually meant by his mean words is Yamaguchi, which took years to learn.

Meanwhile, Shōyō only knew Tsukishima for a year or so.

“I-“

“Hinata-kun. It’s okay. I won’t tell Bokuto-san if you don’t want him to know.”

He unconsciously shook his head as that was not the reason why he lost his capability to talk. The realization that Akaashi-san couldn’t see his gesture came in late. So, the older boy asked him again, “Is it Kuuro the one you want to keep this a secret?”

Shōyō forced himself to speak this time, “N-no.”

“Then, Kenma? I believe he knows already.”

“Yes, he is.”

“Then?”

“It- it’s really not about that. I just realized how right you are, Akaashi-san.”

“About?”

“How scared I am to be rejected by him.”

“Why?”

“I could lose everything I tried so hard to get from him.”

Akaashi went silent. Feeling awkward, Shōyō chuckled to fill in, “Especially, when it’s actually not so much in the first place.”

When no laughs could be heard from the other side of the phone, Hinata bit his lip. He wished he could explain it better. Yet, like the older boy knew how Shōyō was quite frustrated at himself, he spoke again, “Hinata-kun. Can you tell me more about it?”

“I- I don’t know what to say.”

“It’s okay. You can say anything in your mind.”

What’s on his mind, really? Maybe, he could start with one thing he was sure of.

“Well… we all know Volleyball is a team sport, right?”

“Clearly.”

“But, the thing about me and Volleyball is how my shor-“

God, Akaashi-san wouldn’t make fun of Shōyō’s not-so-ideal height, but why did it so hard to voice it out?

“I think I get what you mean, Hinata-kun. You can skip it and go on.”

“Yes, that… That thing about me makes it hard for someone new to trust me as their teammate. They need to see something interesting first before they see me as an equal. Or- or at least, um… someone they want to play Volleyball with. Usually, it took less than three matches to make them change what they see about me, but not with the boy I like. Since we are both in the same grade, we practiced together all the time. Yet… it takes almost a year for him to trust me… and when it did... it felt… different.”

“Different like what?”

“Like I want it all the time.”

“… Okay. So, have you liked him since that moment?”

“I- I think so.”

“You think so?”

“I mean- Um- What I’m trying to say is when he let me receive Suna-san spike rather than block it himself, I felt like my heart went ‘bwah’ like I scored a point while I actually wasn’t.”

“You mean there is a possibility you like him before that moment?”

“Y-yeah.”

Akaashi gave Shōyō a long humming before throws another question, “What do you like about him?”

What did Shōyō like about Tsukishima?

To be honest, he had no idea. Aside from his tall figures, nothing actually caught Shōyō’s interest. Okay, that and his face and his brain and maybe, his opposite approach from Shōyō regarding everything. Meanwhile, when it comes to his personality, he was the worst. At least, for Shōyō. The boy loved to tease him all the time with mean words from time to time. Shōyō couldn’t longer count how many times he had to put up with the ‘short’ and ‘idiot’ jokes. Even though, unlike Kageyama who only could say ‘boke’ to Shōyō whenever they argued, Tsukishima served the teasing in a more sophisticated way.

In Yachi’s word, it’s almost an art.

Whether he really understood the saying or not, Shōyō totally agreed with Yachi. 

“I don’t know.”

“You don’t know?”

Shōyō unknowingly nodded, “Um. What I know is he hates me and likes to tease me all the time. Ah, he also finds me annoying...”

“…That sounds awful.”

“Is it? Is it weird? No, Am I weird to like this kind of boy?”

Akaashi sighed, “No, you’re not. You just like someone different.”

“Is that okay?” asked Shōyō with worry.

The other boy said nothing. At least, for a minute, before he blurted out, “I don’t know, Hinata-kun. Different can be good and also can be bad. Bokuto-san is such a different person from myself, and we turned out okay. With Tsu-, I mean the boy you like, we never know-“

Rather than the ‘different can be anything’ advice Akaashi tried to convince him, Shōyō was way more amazed with how Akaashi-san knew it’s Tsukishima.

“You knew the boy was Tsukishima?”

“Well, it’s not hard to guess.”

“How?”

“Kuuro said it’s the size and physical difference between both of you, which I can’t really explain the context over the reason. At least, not for another year... Meanwhile, Bokuto-san believed it’s because you’re his disciple, then you must be like someone totally opposite from you. And I know because…”

“Because?”

“How hard you are to make him notice you in every Karasuno match I’ve seen before.”

Shōyō gulped, “I’m so easy to read, huh?”

The Setter chuckled, “It’s not a bad thing, Hinata-kun. It means you’re honest.”

* * *

The phone call with Akaashi-san ended abruptly when Bokuto-san snatched the phone from the Setter to tell Shōyō how proud he was of him, whatever he decided to do next. Before he heard those kind words, he didn’t even think that he actually needed that to start moving. To do whatever he was currently trying to do. Whether at accepting that he is gay, or maybe acknowledging that he likes Tsukishima despite the possibility of how crazy he is to like someone who hates him.

At least, he knew now that the Tokyo boys trusted Shōyō enough to make his own decision. 

“BOKE! HINATA BOKE!”

A loud shout from Kageyama and the sound of the ball being slammed to the wood floor was enough to make him snapped back into reality. Shōyō’s eyes followed the movement of the still bouncing volleyball that gave him a taste of how bad the wrath he would receive from his best friend in the near seconds.

He gulped in nervousness.

Shōyō turned around slowly, “Ka- Kag-Kageyama?”

He wished he could curse out loud because Kageyama glared at him like he wished he could eliminate Shõyõ from this world.

Quickly, he slapped both of his palms together while closing his eyes tightly, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry!!! I will spike the ball this time! I promise!”

With nothing but darkness in his sight, Shōyō could clearly hear the sound of Kageyama groaning in frustration before telling him, in the most heartless way, “I won’t toss to someone who can’t spike.”

Feeling challenged, Hinata opened his eyes right away and shouted, “I CAN!”, while hitting his chest with his right hand.

Meanwhile, Kageyama pointed at the floor of the court while screaming with the same intensity as Shōyō, “YOU CAN’T! YOU DIDN’T EVEN JUMP THE LAST TIME! YOU- BOKE!”

He hated Kageyama whenever he called him ‘boke’ in a serious manner, but he loathed himself more when he realized how much the ball from Kageyama he had wasted. As he found ten balls at the side of their court and three on the other side. He turned his head back to Kageyama to really look at him in the eye, “I’m sorry.”

He really was, because Kageyama was more than his best friend, but his Volleyball partner, the one who made him fly.

Kageyama still gave him the serious look, but this time with a little concern on the side, “I thought you will be happy when I said I finally got the gym permission from Daichi-senpai.”

“I am,” said Shōyō softly.

His best friend shook his head, “No, not really. You’re not. Don’t you dare fool me, Hinata.”

The use of his real name without ‘boke’ made Shōyō realize how bad he was at disappointing Kageyama this time. Hinata sighed before approaching the younger boy. He stopped three steps away from the Setter when the sudden words popped out on his mind, and without thinking further, he blurted out, “If I liked boys, would you still be my best friend?”

They both stared at each other. There was a pregnant silence before Kageyama turned his body around to pick the nearest ball on the floor. With his back on Shōyō, he said, “As long as you can spike my toss, I don’t care.”

Hinata bit his bottom lips to repress himself from jumping at the boy in front of him due to his now overwhelmed feeling. No one talked until Shōyō walked to his best position on the court, “Kageyama, I’m ready.”

The dark-haired boy looked at him behind his shoulder and smirked, “Show me what you got, Boke!”

* * *

“Hinata, I like Kiyoko since the first day I met her.”

Shōyō, laying down on his stomach in the middle of two separate futons being merged, between Tanaka-senpai and Nishinoya-senpai, who laid down on their back while looking at the ceiling with blushes on their face. Despite the neck pain he started to feel because of his constant movement to turn left and right in every five seconds through-out their conversation, Shōyō’s heart was full of happiness.

“Since then until now, whenever I see her, I feel like I’m doing rolling thunder without doing one!” said Nishinoya-senpai ecstatically, while Tanaka-senpai laughed until he cried while making fun of Nishinoya-senpai's special move name. In contrast, he found rolling thunder is indeed a cool name for a great trick, so he could not join Tanaka-senpai’s fun time, and chose to focus on to calm Nishinoya-senpai to not throw the pillow at the bald boy.

“I think it’s a cool name, Nishinoya-senpai!”

“See?! Even Hinata said so!”

“Hinata is amazed by everything!”

“HEY, I'M NOT!”

Tanaka-senpai rolled his body to his side. He put his right cheek on his palm with his elbow on the futon, “Okay, then tell your senpai, who’s not cool in Karasuno?”

Shōyō blinked. No, not because he couldn’t understand the question, but because no one, literally no one popped up in his mind. Both of his senpais had noticed this and laughed, “Ryu, you’re such a bad senpai.”

Tanaka laughed, “No, I’m not. It’s just this boy right here,” as he pointed his finger to the still dumbfounded Shōyō, ”thinks everyone who can play Volleyball is cool!”

“But they are!” argued Shōyō right away. 

Tanaka-senpai and Nishinoya-senpai laughed so hard that Nishinoya’s grandpa knocked on the door to ask them to turn down their voices. Shōyō turned his body around to lay down on his back while pouting. Meanwhile, the other two were still trying their best to stop laughing.

“Stop it, “ mumbled Shōyō to them.

It was Tanaka-senpai who finally stopped laughing, “I’m sorry, Hinata. Let’s talk about something else, okay? How about I talk about Kiyoko-san this time?”

To be honest, Shōyō was still mad and now had no interest in listening to another story of Kiyoko-senpai, but it’s better than being laughed at.

“Sure,” in his most disinterested tone.

Tanaka-senpai grinned while ruffling his hair while Nishinoya circled his arm around Hinata’s body while putting his chin on Hinata’s chest. Both of them were ready to hear whatever Tanaka-senpai would say.

“I used to be like you, Kouhai. I only cared about Volleyball until I met Kiyoko-san.”

Nishinoya-senpai chuckled, “Fuck you Ryu! You were nothing like Hinata at all! After all, you met Kiyoko on the first day-“

Tanaka put his index at his mouth, “Shut up! If not, I told Sugawara you said bad words in front of Hinata.”

Shōyō started feeling better and smiled, “I will not tell Sugawara-senpai about this, Nishinoya-senpai!” as he looked at his senpai who’s half of his body already on top of Shōyō's small figure. His senpai grinned and whispered ‘good kid’ at him.

Tanaka coughed, “Anyway, back to my story. People think I like her only because of her beauty. At first, it was. Yet, the longer I like her, the more I realize this feeling is not merely a crush. It’s more than that. I want to get better because of her. I want her to see me. I want her to put attention on me. I want her to tell me I’m doing great. That is why one look from Kiyoko-san makes me feel like I can spike any ball that comes to me.”

Unlike Nishinoya-senpai who smiled proudly at Tanaka-senpai who gestured to do fist-bumped, Shōyō started to separate from the real world and went into the land of his own mind. 

He couldn’t believe everything Tanaka-senpai said was the exact same thing he felt toward Tsukishima.

Did it mean he really liked Tsukishima?

Fuck.

* * *

“I lied. I like Tsukishima like Akaashi-san likes Bokuto-san.”

Kenma gave Shōyō his usual bored eyes. Like he had wasted Kenma’s precious fifteen minutes to play some game for something so unimportant. How he wished he called Akaashi-san instead.

“Say something,” mumbled Shōyō at the image of his best friend’s poker face on his phone screen.

“Congrats?” responded Kenma teasingly.

Shõyõ pouted while crossing his arms. He purposefully turned his head to the side to ignore the annoying sight of Kenma chuckling at him. Why did everyone he trusted really liked to laugh at him these days?

Tanaka-senpai, Nishinoya-senpai, and now the usual reserved Kenma.

“Shōyō~” said Kenma in an adorable way.

He knew how weak Shōyō was when it came to that sweet voice. Without moving any part of his body, he glanced at the screen and was welcomed by Kenma's small smile.

If anyone else was on that screen, he would still be freaking mad, but it’s freaking Kenma and no one, no one should reject the rare soft side of Kenma. Shōyō rolled his eyes before putting both of his elbows at his desk. While deciding what he should say next, Shōyō screen captured Kenma’s oh-so-sweet face for the sake of blackmail material. He even thought about sending it to Kuuro after this face-timed session was done. Kuuro would at least tease the Setter for two days straight before his best friend will punish both of them by not talking to them for at least a week.

And he wasn’t sure he was fine with it. So maybe, the photo ended up as his private collection of people he loves instead.

He sighed as he let his face down, “What should I do?”

“Bokuto-san advice was a good idea.”

“Did the four of you like to talk about me?” said Shōyō while looking up towards his friend. 

Kenma nodded innocently. Meanwhile Shōyō found it frustrating.

“I’m not a kid, you know.”

“I don’t see you as a kid. At least I personally like to talk about you because you’re interesting.”

Hinata puffed out air from his mouth while putting his chin on his elbow, “I’m not a game, Kenma.”

“I know. But still, you’re more interesting than most people.”

Hinata chuckled, “Will you leave me when I become less interesting, then?”

Kenma blinked and Shōyō didn’t like it at all.

“You will, won’t you?” mumbled Shōyō his real thought.

His best friend leaned his back into the chair to give Shōyō a meaningful stare. The silence between them bothered Shōyō so much, he started to try his best to find another topic that will save their friendship. Game, game was a safe option. What kind of game I just played this wee-

“I don’t think I will leave you at all,” answered Kenma suddenly.

This time, Shōyō was the one who lost his words.

Kenma smiled, “Anyway, back to your Tsukishima problem. I think this summer vacation is the right time for you to confess to him. If he rejects you, you can stay at mine until the end of the vacation. We’ll find a way to heal your broken heart then, Shōyō.”

Blame at how serious Kenma was when he said he wouldn’t leave Shōyō, but he couldn’t help but say the most bizarre idea he ever had, “I wish I liked you instead, Kenma.”

Kenma raised his eyebrows, “Are you confessing to me right now?”

In seconds, he blushed so hard he couldn’t think right anymore, “Wha- What- No- I-“

His best friend chuckled, “You’re so interesting.”

“Shut up, Kenma.”

“You love it when I laugh.”

God, he knew his power too much.

“Shut up,” murmured Shōyō between the skins of his elbow, “Please.”

Kenma smirked. Finally, after he tortured Shōyō without rest, the gamer had actually let him have his peace for a while by saying nothing. When nothing but their soft breaths can be heard, his best friend spoke again, “How about you make me your last option, Shōyō?”

He didn’t really understand what Kenma meant so he said nothing.

“I mean, if Tsukishima rejected you, and all the relationships you will have in the future failed, then I don’t mind sticking with you.”

Hinata looked at him weirdly while searching for any indication if Kenma was joking or not and it seemed he wasn’t, “Are you being serious?”

The one who confused him nodded casually.

“Why?”

“For a human, you’re not bad.”

Shōyō shook his head in disbelief.

“You don’t believe me? Ask Kuuro, I never like someone as much as I like you.”

That messed up Shōyõ's mind so much, he might die in a red face. Meanwhile, the supposed to be his best friend didn’t care about his well-being by killing him in embarrassment by pulling another attack, “Are you sure you like Tsukishima and not me?”

“SHUT UP! YOU’RE NOT HELPING, KENMA!”

From his room, he could hear his Mom shout his name to stop screaming from the outside.

* * *

To heal himself from the traumatic face-time he had with Kenma, Shōyō decided to always accept every invitation to hang out with everyone he knew.

It started with a reunion with the already graduated Third Years at Nishinoya-senpai’s house. Everything was great. Aside from Yamaguchi and Tsukishima absences. As they both got a music gig to attend. If Shōyō had finally learned how to put out a great fake smile on his face that day, then it wouldn’t because of Tsukishima. 

The next two days, Shōyō spent time with Kageyama. The first day was to play with some of the first-year members in Karasuno’s gym. He played like they’re in real competition to redeem his fault from before. Based on Kageyama’s smile, he knew the boy had finally forgiven him. Meanwhile the second day was to help Kageyama act like a human he was supposed to be while meeting up with Kindaici and Kunimi. From Shōyō's perspective, he was a quite good teacher as Kindaichi and Kunimi had finally warmed up with Kageyama. 

The fourth day was the most unexpected one because it’s actually Yamaguchi who asked him out. It turned out they weren’t alone, but also with Yachi. He couldn’t believe these two angels trapped him so they can have a not-a-date-but-a-date with him as their perfect decoy. In return, Shōyõ asked them to buy him tons of meat buns on their way home.

When the fifth day came and no one actually asked him to go anywhere, he decided to run to Shiratorizawa. He didn’t know why he did it, but when he saw Goshiki standing in front of their school while looking at the sun with a heroic pose, he asked and slightly forced the boy to accompany him for a day. It was awkward at first, but they ended up enjoying their day while talking about so many things until the night came. He even took the boy home with his bicycle.

As varied as his days were in this summer vacation, there was one constant thing in it. 

Shōyō always took the same exact route whenever he went home. 

To be honest, it was not his usual route from before, but he had predicted it will be later on. The distance was way longer than what he usually used to and the road from this side of the city to his neighborhood was quite bumpy too. 

But the fact he could pass Tsuksihima’s house while riding his bike with this route was enough reason why the decision was not as silly as it sounded before.

Because he missed him so much.

Even five seconds encounter of what belonging to Tsukishima was enough. After all, if it's not enough, he could hide behind some walls near Tsukishima’s house just to look at the window of the other boy’s bedroom for extra seconds. 


	2. When The Moon is Not As Oblivious As Before

“Oya oya~ Chibi-chan looks awful.”

“My disciple! Are you okay?!”

“Hinata-kun, did what we said make you uneasy?”

“Shōyō, you can’t hide your frustration anymore.”

The orange-haired boy didn’t need to look up to know who is saying what now. He was sitting in his desk chair with both of his feet on the seat with his chin placed on top of his knees. He had lost counting how many times he had sighed since his Tokyo friends had one-sidedly made a group video call to check on him. Usually, when they decided to meet up virtually, they would ask Shōyō beforehand and the little crow would prepare himself to act normal. But this particular one was so sudden, he was so not ready.

Especially after he almost got found out by Tsukishima when he looked at the boy’s bedroom window just one hour ago. It was his fault, really. He usually could control his urge by only staying at that not-so-much-hidden-anymore spot fifteen minutes top. But he couldn’t help himself today. As his attempt at replacing Tsukishima’s presence by other people isn’t working anymore. He still remembered how his heart stopped beating for one second when the window was opened by Tsukishima. He yelped in silence before quickly jumped into his bike to save himself from embarrassment.

“UWAHHH” shouted Shōyō suddenly as the memories wrecked him so badly. It shocked everyone that they stopped talking.

It was Akaashi-san who broke the silence, “Hinata-kun?”

“My-my disciple?”

“Chibi-chan~”

“Shōyō, I think you’re going crazy.”

Feeling so overwhelmed, he looked up, “I think you’re right, Kenma, “ before he politely asked for forgiveness from the other three boys, “I’m sorry, Akaashi-san, Bokuto-san, Kuuro-san.”

They looked at him worriedly.

He sighed, “I can’t be like this anymore.”

“Second that,” said Kuuro while grinning, “You know the easiest solution.”

“Confess to Tsukishima? He will eat me alive, Kuuro-san.”

The former Nekoma captain chuckled, “He’s not that scary, you know. After all, he’s allergic to shrimp.”

Shōyō rolled his eyes, “You know what I meant by him ate me alive.”

“We all know what you meant, Hinata-kun. It’s just that-“ spoke Akaashi gently before Kenma cut his word, “You’re being ridiculous.”

“Don’t be mean to my disciple, Kenma!” shouted Bokuto-san right away.

Kenma scoffed, “I never act mean to Shōyō, but he’s not my Shōyō. He’s somebody else who looks like Shōyō. “ as the new Nekoma captain glances at him in a cold stare, “Where’s my Shōyō?”

The room was filled with the other three concerned voices that said Kenma being unreasonable or mean, but Shōyō only could focus on Kenma’s annoyed face. He understood why his best friend snapped at him just now. He had been so patient at handling Shōyō since he went back from Tokyo. If there was one person who Shōyō dumped all his frustration on, it would be Kenma. In Akaashi-san’s words, it is very understandable. 

It was time for him to do something for his best friend back.

“Kenma.”

“What?”

“Can you wait for another day?”

“Wait for what?”

To be honest, nothing had changed in his mind or heart. Not even a slight. He was still not sure if telling Tsukishima his feelings was the right way to finish his current situation. But, if that could make Shōyō get his best friend back to his usual self, then so be it.

“I’ll confess tomorrow.”

Kenma’s eyes were getting bigger as he seemed shocked over his sudden change of mind. Meanwhile Bokuto-san and Kuuro shouted in excitement together. The only one who still looked concerned was Akaashi-san, who quickly asked, “Really?”

Shōyō nodded, “I never back off from my word, Akaashi-san.”

Right before he could see Akaashi-san’s expression, Kenma said something that put his attention back to him, “I’ll wait for you, Shōyō.”

He smiled at his now trying not to smile best friend, “I missed you too, Kenma.”

* * *

He woke up an hour earlier than he usually is today. Rather than five in the morning, he settled at four when he got off from the bed. The fact he had woken up since three was not important. He should have taken note to exclude this part when Kenma asked the detailed story of the first heartbreak of Hinata Shōyō.

After thinking hard of what he should do while waiting until ten before coming down to the city, Shōyō decided to have a morning run to Karasuno before going back to his home. It was indeed stupid but at least the destination was so close to his heart, he knew it was the right activity to do if he wanted to get back at his home at eight. Even though four hours of running wasn’t an ideal choice to do before confession to someone, nothing clears his mind more than running.

Maybe, being exhausted would help him feel better after being rejected to Tsukishima. Rather than crying, he might just go to sleep fast.

He was half-way back to his home when the music on his ears shifted to his ringtone. He stopped moving to see the caller. His mom. Of course, he didn’t leave any note to tell her his son had gone crazy so he needed his self-heal run.

“M-mom?”

_ “Where are you?” _

“I went to run to Karasuno.”

_ “Why didn’t you bike there?” _

“I want to clear my mind.”

Shōyō had never lied to his Mom. Secret was never in their family vocabulary. That was why he didn’t bother to find other excuses, but the truth.

_ “Something bothering your mind?” _

“Someone,” said Shōyō softly.

As he realized the phone call would not be a short one, he walked to the nearest big stone at the side of the road he could see. He sat on it with his back on the road so he could enjoy the peaceful sight of the rice field instead. The two sides of his neighbourhood was one of the reasons why Shōyō doesn’t mind living far. He was happy to live closer to nature, after all.

Once he settled in, his Mom asked, “Can I know who this lucky person is?”

Shōyō wished he could laugh at his mom’s question because it’s impossible for Tsukishima to consider himself lucky by knowing Shōyō liked him. Of course, he didn’t say that to his precious Mom. He needed to respect his mom’s love toward him as she never saw Shōyō as someone that was less than perfect.

He smiled before replying, “My teammate.”

Long silence was what he expected, but it seemed his Mom was so not unaffected by the fact he likes boys. She quickly replied, “ _ Kageyama-kun? _ ”

That, he laughed.

“No, of course not, Mom! He’s my best friend!”

_ “Well, I don’t know your other team mates.” _

Shōyō sighed, “His name is Tsukishima Kei.”

His mom gave a long humming,  _ “Is the boy a good kid?” _

Lies are not things he did to his mom, but finding the right answer is, “He’s the smartest kid at school.”

Shōyō could hear his mom scoff,  _ “You’re good at finding a partner, my son.” _

“Mom~”

“I hope he can help your study.”

The orange-haired boy chuckled, “He’s not my boy-“, and suddenly he stopped to look around if there were people near him. Once he was sure he’s safe, he continued, “Boyfriend.”

_ “Will you tell him you like him?” _

Even though he knew that would be his main agenda of the day, but to be asked that straightforwardly made him shocked. Nevertheless, he answered truthfully, “Yes, today.”

Unlike before, her mom stayed silent for a while before speaking again,  _ “I’ll iron your favourite shirt, love. You always look handsome in that.” _

Out of the blue, his eyes were getting damp when a sudden realization came into his mind. His mom had fully supported him with this side of his. Deep down, he knew she would be like this, but to think and to know is really two different things.

_ “Your dad will totally tease you, though.” _

__

Fighting over his tears, Shoyo could only chuckle.

_ “Come home, love. I want to hug you.” _

“Um,” answered Shōyō before he ended the call.

He ran so fast, the first thing he said to his mom is ‘I love you’.

* * *

Shōyō was standing right in front of the place he visited the most during this summer vacation. Tsukishima Kei’s house. The unreachable dimension he thought he would never be able to step into. Even though, the only thing he needed to do was to knock and ask to meet Tsukishima to whoever was welcoming him from the front door.

He knew that.

But somehow, he couldn’t move his body.

Kenma demanded him to do this. Bokuto-san, Akaashi-san and Kuuro-san too. His mom had already helped him to choose the right clothes for this specific reason. That was enough reason why Shōyō knew he had to do this.

But again, he could only stare at the bell of this house and did nothing.

It was only after someone called his name from behind, he could move again.

“HINATA!”

Shōyō was startled by the familiar voice. He turned around to see Yamaguchi waving to him with Tsukishima standing behind him. The boy he likes looked at him in a bored expression. Meanwhile, Yamaguchi, always an angel, asked him to play with them.

“I’ll open the door for you! Just go there!” said Yamaguchi excitedly while pointing to his house gate before disappearing from the window. Shōyō was still not moving as Tsukishima was looking at him. Like he’s a weird species he had just found.

Was this really the way to end his current suffering? With Yamaguchi around to see how his best friend will stomping Shōyō’s heart into pieces?

Tsukishima moved closer to the window and closed it. The action made Shōyō startled at first, but enough to make him walk to Yamaguchi’s house. Once he got there, Yamaguchi had already welcomed him with a big smile.

“What are you doing in front of Tsukki’s place?”

Shōyō scratched the back of his head as he’s searching for the most reasonable one to give to his kind teammate, “I- I want to ask him about our homework.”

“I could do that for you too, Hinata,” said Yamaguchi kindly.

The middle blocker bit his inner bottom lip, “But I forgot to bring my book,” and ended it with awkward giggles. He was so not him as he couldn’t help but feeling half-scared and half-nervous for his bad capability at lying. Fortunately, Yamaguchi smiled.

“It’s okay. It means you can just hang out with us.”

How lucky Yachi is to have Yamaguchi as her boyfriend, Shōyō told himself.

He smiled genuinely this time as he felt so grateful over his friend’s kind heart. People wouldn’t believe if Shōyō told them how Yamaguchi used to mock him too with Tsukishima before. He also had no clear memories since when their relationship became so good. Despite the confusion, Shōyō found comfort in his presence. Maybe, this current scenario was not the way God playing with his life, but the way He protected Shōyō instead.

“Come in,” as Yamaguchi walked him into his house. The freckled boy kept talking while showing Shōyō the way to his bedroom. He only stopped when he introduced him to his Mom. Like a good kid he was, he greeted the woman politely. So good, Yamaguchi’s mom asked his son to bring him often.

Yamaguchi opened his bedroom door and let Shōyō in. The first thing he saw was Tsukishima laid on the bed casually with a music magazine on his hands. The taller boy put down the magazine just to smirk at him, “Long time no see, Shrimpy.”

He is supposed to be attacking this beanpole back like what he always does before. Yet, his heart was so full of emotions, he did nothing. Well, not really nothing, but staring at his crush, Kenma’s words, in dumb expression. His assumption was right when Tsukishima, once again, told him off, “Stop looking so dumb,” as he went back to read the magazine.

“Tsukki!” shouted Yamaguchi at his best friend. He approached Tsukishima in a hard step to ask him to get off from the bed, “Don’t be mean to Hinata. Get down and sit on the carpet now.”

“You used to side with me, Yamaguchi.”

“I’m not anymore. Hinata is our friend,” said the freckled boy sternly.

Tsukishima scoffed, “ _ Your  _ friend,” as he got down from the bed and sat on the carpet instead.

Shōyō, who was still standing near the door, observed the dynamic of their friendship in amazement. Yamaguchi was a cool person. Even more than Tsukishima. He tamed that cold-hearted brat, after all. 

Tsukishima glanced at him, “Sit, Shrimpy.”

Before he moved, it was Yamaguchi who dragged him to sit beside Tsukishima. His heart was beating so abnormally now, he wished he had a switch off button for it. After long seconds, he thought how silly the idea was. He was having a crush, not planning to die.

Shōyō tilted his head a little to glance at Tsukishima who surprisingly looked at him too. He gave him a questioning eye, “Shrimpy, you’re so weird today.”

Being caught on, Shōyō shook his head heart, “N-no, I-I wasn’t.”

Tsukishima frowned before going back to his neutral bitter expression and ignored Shōyō. The not-so-pleasant atmosphere was saved by Yamaguchi’s brilliant idea, “Tsukki, where the CD?”

“In my bag.”

Feeling curious, Shōyō joined the conversation. That, and also to stop acting like a weirdo.

“What’s CD?”

Yamaguchi, who was still standing, bent down to pick out something from Tsukishima’s bag. Once he got what he wanted, he walked to his CD player, “People love to buy songs on iTunes, but we still like to collect albums. This one is the newest album from our favourite singer Rex Orange County.”

As weird as it sounded, even from himself, he was quite familiar with the name of the band. He tried to remember where he ever heard it. Whether it was from Kenma or Goshiki, he didn’t remember. Maybe, he should have heard the songs first.

Excited to know the answer, Shōyō asked Yamaguchi to play it quickly. Tsukishima sighed so big beside him like he was so tired over his act. If his heart was a little bit hurt, he tried to dismiss it.

Once the album started to play, Shōyō moved his head left and right with the melodies. Yamaguchi smiled when he noticed him while approaching his best friend. He sat beside Tsukishima to talk about the news he heard about the singer. The taller boy was as excited as Yamaguchi to talk about it too. Shōyō did not bother being left alone because what he saw now was something he always wanted to know about Tsukishima.

What the boy was like outside the school and the court.

He was so immersed with the interaction between two boys in front of him, he silently observed them on the side. Not wanting to disturb them. Until the familiar melodies caught his attention. As soon as the vocals came in, he smiled. He knew it, he knows this singer. His movement got more excited until he started to sing along with it with his butchered English.

“ _ But girl, well don’t you worry about me. It ain’t new to me. Feeling this lonely, darling. Girl, don’t worry about me. But if you’re ever unhappy. Then maybe, baby, I must let you go. Let you go _ .”

He closed his eyes while enjoying the song, but Yamaguchi shouted his name, he snapped his eyes open, “W-what?”

“You knew the song! You have a great voice, Hinata.”

He blushed to hear Yamaguchi’s compliment. He giggled in awkward, “I only know this one song, though… Kenma or Goshiki told me before.”

Yamaguchi grinned. He looked towards his best friend with a smug face and nudged Tsukishima’s arm with his elbow, “See, we’re not the only two who know Rex.”

The blonde-haired boy rolled his eyes while saying, “Shut up, Yamaguchi,” before looking at Shōyõ for a while before clicking his tongue like he hates the fact Shōyō knows something that he likes. This time, it hurts too much for Shōyō to ignore it.

* * *

The ache on his heart got so unbearable the more he spent the time with Tsukishima. It was only two hours, but the boy had said and done too many things he couldn’t handle.

“Lame,” said Tsukishima when he saw Shōyō couldn’t reach an empty glass at the far-edge of the floor table they currently circled on. It didn’t matter that Yamaguchi scolded his best friend for Shōyō’s sake, the pain was still there.

“Your hair is so distracting,” hissed Tsukishima while looking up to him as Shōyō got back from the bathroom. This time, Yamaguchi was on the phone with Yachi to even notice the taller boy’s mean remark.

“Can you eat like a human do?” told Tsukishima when Shōyō munched the meat buns Yachi was suddenly brought to Yamaguchi’s house. The girl got shocked over the remarks, he looked at his boyfriend, who also looked at his best friend in horror. Both of the angels look at him in worry, but Shōyõ only smiles before throwing an empty insult back, “Mean-shima.”

He had to endure this as he needed to find a way to be alone with Tsukishima so he could do what he already planned in the first place. But to suddenly ask the boy to talk to him alone with Yamaguchi and Yachi around was not easy. Especially when the boy himself always threw out mean jokes easily and found Shōyō’s presence annoying.

Shōyō was still so sure about his decision to confess to Tsukishima until the boy truly broke him down. They were watching a movie, which turned out to be one of Tsukishima’s favourite films.

Lost in translation.

He was so excited to watch it because his Mom, weirdly, let him watch this movie when he was only thirteen and he liked the actor of the movie.

Bill Murray.

Who from Tsukishima’s perspective did not make sense because he also liked the actor. He did not say that in words, but by clicking his tongue in a disgusted manner towards him.

He didn’t say anything until Yamaguchi paused the film to walk Yachi to the front door as her Mom called her to go home.

The reason behind Tsukishima’s mean word was so unreasonable, he couldn't help, but snapped.

“You’re such a Meanshima!” shouted Shōyō right away to the boy beside him after Yamaguchi closed his bedroom door.

He was supposed to say he liked Tsukishima. Not having a fight with him.

“Took you so long to act like an idiot you are, Shrimpy.” hissed the boy quickly.

“What’s wrong with me being short, having orange hair, can’t eat properly like you, know Rex and like Bill Murray?!”

This time, Tsukishima blinked. He must have not expected that. Like it’s his pre-condition over everything, he clicked his tongue again with an irritating face.

Shōyō shook his head in disbelief before saying, “What’s so disgusting about me that makes you hate me so much, Tsukishima?”, and he ran out from the bedroom.

He was so grateful he had not brought any bag with today, because for sure, he would definitely have left it there. And the future visit to Yamaguchi’s house, which was so close with Tsukishima’s, to get his bag back didn’t sound nice at the moment.

As he just got out of the room with a door still opened, Yamaguchi was approaching him, “What’s wrong with you?” in a worried voice.

Shōyō shook his head, “Nothing. Thank you for everything, Yamaguchi.”

He had not waited for the other boy’s reaction before he walked again.

From afar Shōyō could hear Yamaguchi ask his friend ‘What did you do, Tsukki?!’ and somewhat panic answered from Tsukishima, ‘I don’t know!’.

* * *

He ran so fast to the place he parked his bicycle. A small park near Yamaguchi and Tsukishima’s house. Whether from running too fast or feeling too much at the moment, Shōyõ was breathing so hard when he prepared his bicycle in tremor hands. Everything started to blurry and he knew he could burst out in tears at any moment now. And he hated it.

He hated how he kept crying over someone who did not care about him. Not even a bit.

Shōyō scooched down in frustration as he kept failing to unlock his bike lock. He put one of his hands on the seat of his bicycle while looking down exhaustedly.

“I’m so tired,” murmured Shōyō to himself.

It was long seconds of silence with only the sound of night summer breeze surrounding him, before he heard someone approaching near. He hoped it wasn’t Yamaguchi, because he really didn’t know how to explain his recent act.

“Shrim- I mean, Hinata.”

He blinked when he heard the voice from someone he was not expecting.

The boy repeated his name again, “Hinata.”

Shōyō closed his eyes tight before he readied himself again to free his bike from the bicycle parking rack. He needed to go from this place fast. He was not in the mood to talk to this person anymore.

No more confession.

No more stupid crush.

No more Tsukishima Kei ruined his mind and his heart.

When he had finally released his bike from the rack, Tsukishima was already standing behind him.

“Let’s finish the movie, hm?” said the one who had hurt him so bad today.

It was not fair how gentle the voice was. Why did Tsukishima have to act kind now? Why? Why did he have to be this nice when Shōyō had lost every courage he had to tell him he liked him?

“I won’t say unnecessary things anymore,” added Tsukishima in a softer tone.

Why?

Shōyō said nothing and did nothing. One move and the tears he had so hard to withstand would fall easily. Tsukishima had humiliated him enough for today. If he let the boy see him cry now, he will hate himself for life. So, he jumped to his bike and left the boy right away.

Once he got home, he promised to himself he will never ride a bike in this condition anymore. As the tears and the snots were so distracting. Not to mention, how bad he sounded when he started to ugly sobbed through-out the ride.

* * *

He was supposed to call Kenma about what happened between him and Tsukishima.

He believed his best friend had already gone berserk now as he had turned his phone off since the night of that horrible experience. It was three days ago. As much as he hated to make his best friend angry, Shōyō only wanted to play with Natsu.

Because Natsu would love him easily. Without him had to do something about himself first.

Unlike other people out there.

Other than that, he also believed that by turning off his phone, he also made Akaashi-san, Bokuto-san and Kuuro-san in bad positions. Without being physically in Tokyo, he knew Kenma had already spread his murderous vibe to those three people now. He had to remember that he will buy them many snacks from Miyagi when he goes to Tokyo.

“Nii-chan~”

He was lucky to have Natsu on his side.

Shōyō smiled at his little sister. He was currently lying down on the soil ground in their backyard. The sight of his sister is upside down as she looks down at him while standing on the top side of his head now.

“Yes, Natsu-chan?”

“Your friend is here.”

He blinked, “Who-”

“Shōyō~”

His mom's sweet voice distracted him as he quickly turned his head to the inside part of his house. The traditional Japanese door was being open wide as his mom stood at the outside part of the wooden floor. There was someone in the living room. Easily, he raised himself into sit position to take a clearer view of who was behind his Mom. When he recognized who it was, he blurted out, “What are you doing here?!”

“Get up now, Shōyō! Tsukishima-kun has kindly brought meat buns for you. I’ll prepare it now! Natsu, come here!” said his Mom while patting Tsukishima’s back softly with an excited face. Once Natsu was holding her hand, she was walking inside the house while whistling happily.

Did she think Tsukishima was his boyfriend?

Shōyō sighed as he had to talk to his Mom right after this bean pole went home. Before that, he repeated his recent question, “What are you doing here?”

This time with more dignity.

He hoped.

Tsukishima smirked. Meanwhile Shōyō squinted his face in distaste as he knew there was no dignity left in him for the boy who was now standing at the porch, “To finish the movie with you,” as he looked down at Shōyō.

Could his heart side with him right now and stop beating so fast?

He bit his inner bottom lip to control himself from saying ‘yes’ right away. He saved himself when he found a quite nice reply, “I had seen the movie before.”

“So do I. Let’s  _ finish _ the  _ unfinished _ , Hinata.”

The way Tsukishima emphasized some words made him shivers. He wouldn’t kill Shōyō in his own house, right? Realizing he wouldn’t win this argument, he shrugged, “Let’s watch it then,” as he got into the house, leaving Tsukishima alone on the porch. Shōyō plopped himself on the sofa, “Sit. I only have TV in this room.”

Tsukishima, who was standing at the side of the sofa chair smiled evilly at him, “I brought my laptop. Let’s watch it in your room.”

Shōyō was sure something was so off now.

Could he ask his Mom to accompany them?

“Such a considerate _ friend _ !” exclaimed his Mom while walking out from the kitchen. She brought a plate full of meat buns and gave it to the still dumbfounded Shōyō. He couldn’t believe his Mom had one-sidedly assumed that Tsukishima had accepted his confession and became his boyfriend.

Which was worse? The fact Tsukishima probably sliced him alive or him broke his mother’s heart?

“I like to be considerate, Hinata-san.”

Shōyō wanted to explode over Tsukishima’s perfect acting.

The happy smile on his Mom's face made Shōyō decide that it was his mother’s heart that much more important, “I’ll go to my room now, Mom!”

He got off from the sofa and walked to the corridor that will lead to his bedroom. Tsukishima bent politely at his Mom before following him from behind. He heard how his mom shouts at them excitedly, “Have fun, you two!”

In soft voices, Tsukishima muttered, “We will.”

Only Kami-sama could help him now.

Once they got into the room, Hinata opened the door and let Tsukishima in. From his position, to see someone he liked to be in his private space feels intimate. No matter how much he still had ill feelings toward the boy. He used to talk about the boy all the time in this room to all his friends. And now, he was here.

Tsukishima was standing in the middle of the room while looking around.

“I thought your wall would be orange.”

One sentence from the boy and he dismissed every nice thought Shōyō currently has towards him.

“Weird-shima,” he muttered in defense as he closed the door and put the plate full of meat buns on his desk.

The blonde-haired boy scoffed before he asked, “Where do you usually let your guest sit?”

“My bed.”

“You get up in there, then. I’ll join next.”

Shōyō startled over the suggestion, “Wh-What?”

For him to lay down beside his friend in the bed was something usual for Shōyō. He was supposed to be okay with what Tsukishima asked him just now. But Tsukishima was not really his friend. He wouldn’t want Shōyō to cuddle with him like Kenma or Nishinoya-san would, right?

“You’re the host and I don’t like to sit near the wall,” explained Tsukishima.

Ah, that was the reason. As he originally preferred to sleep next to the wall, he obeyed what Tsukishima ordered without debating. Not because he was weak to the boy. No.

Once he settled in, Tsukishima joined him right away. Shõyō let one of his pillows sit on his laps as he let Tsukishima put the laptop on it. They didn’t say anything while the boy prepared the movie. He carefully forwarded the movie at the exact scene they paused before in Yamaguchi’s house. If he found Tsukishima cool, he would not say it out loud.

As soon as the movie started, Tsukishima said, “You had seen the movie before, right?”

With a frown on his face, Shōyō answered the boy while looking up at him, “Yeah?”

He wished Tsukishima was not as tall as he is. From his point of view, Tsukishima looked so scary now.

“Good. We can talk, then.”

Shōyō gulped, “W-what?”

“About your childish tantrum at Yamaguchi’s before.”

“I-

“And to tell your ignorant self about the unnecessary drama you caused in my fucking life.”

He knew Tsukishima and Yamaguchi were cursing sometimes, but to be received one was quite shocking. But, the boy’s accusation of him ruining his life when he’s the one doing it to his felt so unfair, “What?!”

Tsukishima crossed his arms now while looking up-front now and frustratingly complained like he had enough, “Nekoma’s setter told Kuuro to asked your where-abouts to Daichi-san because it turns out Nekoma setter’s favorite person had been disappeared for the last three days. Daichi-san bombarded the Karasuno group chat to ask about you to everyone. Yamaguchi told them about what happened between us and everyone texted me now. Even the Tokyo ones.”

He wanted to snickers because this might be the longest talk he had heard from the boy since day one. Yet, the fear of Tsukishima killing him was much bigger. So, he settled with, “I’m sorry.”

Tsukishima scoffed, “Sorry?! I need explanation rather than your sorry ass!”, as he turned the volume on.

Shōyō covered his face with both of his hands to stop himself from laughing out loud. Tsukishima that he knew was a cool person. But his sudden out-burst made him realize how he was also still a teenager. Same as him.

“Stop covering your face and start explaining!” as he waved his hands in the air due to his frustration.

Shōyō took a deep breath before uncovering his face. With his best poker face, he said, “I’ll explain to everyone and ask them to not bother you anymore.”

Tsukishima, though calmer, still whined in his own way, “I need an explanation too.”

This time, it was Shōyō who crossed his arms while looking at him in a serious face, “It doesn’t matter.”

The blonde-haired boy raised his eyebrows, “You’re pissing me off.”

“I know. But really, you will be more pissed off if you know the reason, “argued Shōyō.

“Stop being dramatic.”

“I am not. You can’t handle it.”

“Said the one who walked out before.”

Unlike before, that remark hit Shōyō differently. He gripped his hand hard to the meat of his arm, “Can you stop?”

“Stop what?” hissed Tsukishima back with the same foul mood.

“Being this… asshole.”

“You’re cursing now?”

Was that what really mattered?

“You can and I can’t?”

Tsukishima shrugs, “Never said that.”

Both put their best intimidating face. None wanted to lose. It was Tsukishima who attacked him first, “Since when did you take my home route to get back to your house?”

To hear that question, Shōyō flinched in fear.

“Isn’t the route much further and bumpier?”

Shōyō was starting to lose his will to win this fight.

“Shrimp, I asked you.”

“You- you saw me?” stuttered Shōyō.

“It’s not hard to notice an orange boy with a bike standing behind the wall while looking at my window like a creep, you know.”

Shōyō gulped.

“Why did you do that? Not to mention, how weird you were to stand in front of my house before you went to Yamaguchi.”

Unknowingly, Shōyō moved the pillow with the laptop from his lap to Tsukishima so he could press both of his knees to his chest. Tsukishima remained silent. As he didn’t want to face the boy beside him so he put his head down.

Without being able to see the other boy’s face, Shōyō already could imagine how confused Tsukishima must be, “Since when did you become this complex infuriating human being? You’re supposed to be an annoying one brain cell idiot.”

He hugs his knees tighter while tapping his feet in panic to the bed.

“Shrimpy.”

Could he stop and leave him alone?

“Shortie.”

What an insensitive bean pole.

“Idiot.”

He wished he didn’t like Tsukishima.

“Hinata.”

His feet stopped moving.

“What’s wrong with you?”

Without looking up, Shōyō mumbled, “I’m sorry.”

“Why are you keep saying sorry? It’s annoying.”

Despite Tsukishima's protest, he said the forbidden words once again, “I’m sorry.”

“Fuck, stop it. Who are you?” asked Tsukishima frustratedly.

Who was he?

He was Hinata Shōyō. A sixteen years old boy who wanted to play Volleyball forever. He was small but it’s okay because he could jump high. He loved his family and his friends with all of his heart. He would do anything for them. Aside from that, he also just knew about the fact he was gay and luckily everyone who loved him as much as he loved them accepted it. And that was what really mattered.

The part where he got scared to be rejected by Tsukishima should have been the most unimportant part of his life. So what if the boy didn’t like Shōyō back?

He could still play Volleyball.

He was still loved by his family and friends.

Then, why did he have to be this coward?

In Nishinoya-senpai’s words, fuck it.

He looked up and turned his head around to stare at Tsukishima’s questioning eyes, “Tsukishima.”

His crush smirked,”Is the Shrimpy finally here?”

Shōyō ignored the remark, “I like you.”

Tsukishima blinked multiple times.

He repeated again, “I like you. I like you like Tanaka-senpai and Nishinoya-senpai likes Kiyoko-senpai.”

They stared at each other for a long time before Shōyō started to move his feet again, “Quick. Reject me.”

With that, he scored some reaction from Tsukishima, “Huh?”

“You hate me, Tsukishima.”

“Hate is not the right word. More like annoyed.”

Due to his impatient heart, he dismissed it, “Same thing. Reject me now.”

Tsukishima scoffed, “Do you know confession is a two-ways communication?”

“Stop with your difficult words.”

“It’s not difficult. It's common sense.”

“Can you just reject me?”

“Who says I will?”

Shōyō looked at him in shock, “So, you- you like me back?”

“You wish.”

Shōyō rolled his eyes, “Then, reject me. Kenma said this is a great time to have a broken heart. I can stay at his house until the end of the holiday. I will not bother you anymore when we get back to school. Maybe, I will not like you anymore too then. Re-“

“Is this really your way of treating your crush?” asked Tsukishima with a neutral face.

“Huh?”

“Not letting them speak.”

Shōyō was so frustrated at the way Tsukishima played him. He surrendered, “Speak then.”

“You like me.”

It’s not a question, neither statement. Just a repetition, or maybe reassurance of their current situation.

Shoyo nodded weakly.

“Why?” asked Tsukishima innocently. Well, as innocent as that face could make.

“Have no idea.”

“Are you really that stupid?”

That’s it.

” If you’re so smart, then answer this for me. What will you do when every time you see someone, you feel like you want to puke?”

“Are you sure you like me and don’t hate me?” replied Tsukishima right away.

“Yeah. Because it’s the same feeling I had before the Volleyball match and I love Volleyball.”

This time, it took seconds before the man reacted to him, “Weird.”

He was so tired. God, stopped this torture, please.

“It’s not weird. It’s just bwah!”

The taller boy shook his head, “Not helping. It’s getting weirder.”

“Shut up,” as he looked down exhaustedly.

Tsukishima nudged his elbow to the side of Shōyō's body to ask him to look at him again “How about now? Do you want to puke?”

Shōyō bit his bottom lips and nodded, “I am. To be honest, I don’t know how to handle this… this pahh emotions.”

Tsukishima gave him a questioning look. Of course, he wouldn’t understand. He took a deep breath before pouring anything he felt into somewhat structured words that Tsukishima could understand. Of course, he couldn’t expect much as he wasn’t that good at being a proper speaker.

“It hurts so much when you’re being mean to me. It feels like I’m flying when you compliment me. It angers me when you treat me badly. It frustrates me when I can’t see you. You give me-“, he started to give up and just went what he could give to the boy, ”gwah and bwah just like when I do a quick spike with Kageyama. So fast, even sometimes I can’t control it. But the quick spike only happens when I’m in the court. With you, it’s all the time. Even when I can’t see you… No… It’s much worse when I don’t see you.”

Tsukishima stunned before saying, “…It sounds awful.”

Despite the irony of his situation, Shōyō laughed at it, “Yes, it is.”

Unexpectedly, Tsukishima chuckled too, “Don’t laugh, you idiot.”

Shōyō ignored it by continuing to laugh. Tsukishima waited while looking at him in silence. Shōyō gradually stopped laughing before giving out a big sigh, “Gosh, it feels so good to say it out loud!”

“How long do you keep this by yourself?”

He looked at the ceiling while thinking, “Maybe a year?”

Tsukishima shook his head, “No wonder you got weirder each day.”

Shōyō pouted, “Meanshima.”

The boy smirked, “You’re really an idiot. You could have said it from the start and you wouldn’t feel  _ those _ horrible things.”

He couldn’t help but get curious, “You won’t mind?”

“Why would I? It’s your feeling.”

Shōyō looked at Tsukishima like he had freed him from an invisible chain. No wonder he liked this boy so much. He always has and always will be the one that could give Shōyō a different perspective on many things. For that, he was grateful Tsukishima was the boy he liked.

Shōyō bumped his shoulder to Tsukishima’s side, “Yeah, you’re right. Thank you.”

Before Tsukishima replied to him, Natsu suddenly opened the door, “Nii-chan~ Mom said I can play with your giant friend.”

“Giant?” said Tsukishima with a salty face. If it was Shōyō who said it instead of Natsu, he knew the tall boy wouldn’t be this kind.

Shōyō looked at Natsu’s happy face before returning to Tsukishima, “Yes, this is Giant-kun.”

“Shrim- Hinata, don’t teach something weird to a kid.”

Such a polite reaction. It would be if not with a death-glare he sent to Shōyō.

“Giant-kun!” as she ran to the side of the bed to pull Tsukishima’s shirt, “Let’s play Volleyball with Nii-chan in our yard!”

Tsukishima looked at the little girl in a dumbfounded look, but let an awkward smile cracked on his face in the end, “Okay.”

Natsu jumped in excitement and went out from the room while shouting ‘Giant-kun wants to play with Natsu’ to his Mom.

Shōyō glanced at Tsukishima and teasingly said, “Well, let’s play… Giant-kun?”

Tsukishima slapped the back of his head hard, “You’re really annoying, you’re pissing me off.”

“MEANSHIMA!”

**End of Part I**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song is 'Corduroy Dreams' from Rex Orange County.   
> Anyway, hoped you like the ending.

**Author's Note:**

> FYI, I really love Kenhina, they will always be platonically lovey-dovey through-out the series.


End file.
